Glossybox – It’s not me, it’s you.
It’s always sad when a love affair ends. Sure, I’m an older woman and I was paying for his services (£12.95 a month as it happens) but he was so young and eager to please. I freely admit my head was turned as he seduced me with promises of ‘deluxe beauty samples’ and an ‘invitation to indulge and experience the world of beauty’ – sweet music to my ears.
It was the little things at first, old lady perfume samples I could’ve picked up for free at Debenhams; a cheap looking, musty smelling, ‘own brand’ brush; garish false eyelashes the cast of TOWIE would’ve rejected for being too over the top. Small grievances, but still, they hurt.
He’s toying with you, my mum said after binning yet another perfume sample I passed onto her. He’s taking your money and making a fool out of you. Have some pride in yourself and end it now before the August box subscription comes round.
I tackled him of course. “Why are you giving away all your love and the really great products to established bloggers and for free as well?” I screamed. “And yet, here am I, actually paying for your services and I get all the crap!”
Of course he denied it, “Oh noooo, you are my lovely ladies, I do treat you all the same.” He cooed in silky smooth tones. But there was no fooling me, I trawled the net and reader, I found heartbreak. Gifts of HD Brows Eye Smoothing Serum, hair oils and a Dermalogica Clean Start Kit I would’ve killed for. He even (I can barely type this) sent roses to several bloggers on Valentine’s Day, oh the utter humiliation of it all!
Of course, there was only one thing I could do – I dumped him by email. I thought he’d at least put up a fight but no, he said he was sorry it ended and he wished me luck. He also had the cheek to say we could get together again in the future if I ever changed my mind!